Hello again, Internet. I see you have gotten along rather well in my absence, but all good things must come to an end. Deal with it. I could recount all of my grand adventures since my last post, but I want this to be a shorter entry than normal. In fact, I want all my future entries to be shorter from here on. Why? Because I can. Also, because you asked for it. Or, at least, the Internet at large did. So consider this my gift to you...
Read MoreI Offend Globally
Give me money
About Me
Kristian Bland
Writer
Occasional Geek
I'm a former Webmaster turned Journalist turned Systems Administrator. I once thought I could recreate Spider-Man's web fluid, but only ended up staining the driveway of my friend's parents when some of it spilled out and went runny. Eventually, I became a caustic tech geek, which I'm pretty sure inspired the character of Dr. Gregory House, although the bastards never credited me. Later in life, I'd go on to have a horrific experience in publishing that I don't talk about, except to talk about how I don't talk about it. Later still, I became a web editor and columnist for a Hearst newspaper, where I excelled at being Me until my entire department was unceremoniously laid off. After that, I spent about six months being pretty busy not being busy. It sucked. Then, after missing the light of my radiant glory casting its warmth upon the newsroom for long enough, the paper called me up and asked me back. So I went back. And then I left again. And here we are.
Tweet! Tweet!
- If the memory machine in Total Recall was real, I'd use it to put a fake memory in my head of seeing the new Total Recall. So I never would. about 7 hours ago from Twitter for iPad ReplyRetweetFavorite
- Someone in north Texas is apparently trying to use http://t.co/Y7Hebxka to look for a job. As me. Identity Theft: You're doing it wrong. about 11 hours ago from Twitter for iPad ReplyRetweetFavorite
- "Papa? How about you sing quietly to yourself instead of out loud to me and Mama? Like, maybe sing inside your head. So we can't hear you." about 1 day ago from Twitter for iPhone ReplyRetweetFavorite
- I'm a bit annoyed that @boss_chick601 registered her Twitter with my email address, but at least @Robert2fly "kno dat ass." So there's that. about 1 day ago from Twitter for iPad ReplyRetweetFavorite


