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I was at a loss for a subject for today’s post until about half an hour ago, after Brittany disclosed her discovery of the vile and regrettable videotaped evidence of my first wedding. She’s been working on cleaning out the accumulated detritus of my office, which has – for the last year or so – been the dumping ground of everything that wouldn’t fit anywhere else in the house. It started with boxes, when my...
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We are forever slouching towards Wedding Day, with some days being more slouchy than others. The past few days have been both unproductive and uneventful, as we continue to suffer the effects of being Under The Weather. And, when you live deep in the armpit of Texas, there’s a lot of weather to be under. This past weekend brought us beautiful Autumnal weather, in the sense that highs in the mid-60s represents Fall for this part of the...
Read MoreYou may have noticed that last week’s edition of Coquetting Tarradiddles was a little light by about three essays. There was a good reason for this, and although I hate tossing shovels full of excuses into the unsuspecting eyes of my readers, I’ll go ahead and clue you in on the sordid goings on that transpired during the latter days of the previous week. Things started out great on Monday, and continued along at a pleasant and...
Read MoreYou might have noticed that Wednesday passed without an entry from Brittany. This was not her fault. I hijacked her space, once again. I really am terrible about this. I bogart her days much too often, and I’d apologize for it, if only I didn’t enjoy hearing myself talk so damned much. Other things happened Wednesday, which were unfortunate but unavoidable. A few minutes before 6:00 p.m. rolled around, I was typing up the day’s essay...
Read MoreBrittany and I were sitting in a restaurant tonight, each of us furiously concentrating on the cutting and the chewing and the swallowing of two extremely delicious steaks, when it occurred to me that my lovely fiancee has all of the power and the radiance of a thousand suns bursting at once in the sky – and meeting her destroyed my world. She came upon me like a feral cat, wild and hungry with a hidden strength rippling beneath her...
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Kristian Bland
Writer
Occasional Geek
I'm a former Webmaster turned Journalist turned Systems Administrator. I once thought I could recreate Spider-Man's web fluid, but only ended up staining the driveway of my friend's parents when some of it spilled out and went runny. Eventually, I became a caustic tech geek, which I'm pretty sure inspired the character of Dr. Gregory House, although the bastards never credited me. Later in life, I'd go on to have a horrific experience in publishing that I don't talk about, except to talk about how I don't talk about it. Later still, I became a web editor and columnist for a Hearst newspaper, where I excelled at being Me until my entire department was unceremoniously laid off. After that, I spent about six months being pretty busy not being busy. It sucked. Then, after missing the light of my radiant glory casting its warmth upon the newsroom for long enough, the paper called me up and asked me back. So I went back. And then I left again. And here we are.
