Get a dictionary. Look it up.
I was at a loss for a subject for today’s post until about half an hour ago, after Brittany disclosed her discovery of the vile and regrettable videotaped evidence of my first wedding. She’s been working on cleaning out the accumulated detritus of my office, which has – for the last year or so – been the dumping ground of everything that wouldn’t fit anywhere else in the house. It started with boxes, when my...
Read More
It’s picture pages day here at Coquetting Tarradiddles, and I’ve got a dozen or so wedding photos to share with the quivering horde of my readership. I’ll (try and fail to) go light on the prose and heavy on the visual aids today, so let’s get started. For the less net-savvy amongst you, remember that you can click on any picture for a larger version. The first photo up for viewing was taken after the ceremony,...
Read More
The wedding is almost here, and we’re only two days away from “that dweam within a dweam”, despite what the neurotic countdown clock in my sidebar is telling you. This essay will be my last as a single man. The next time you hear from me, I will be shackled to the keyboard as a husband, the obligatory ball and chain fastened to my ankle and chaffing my delicate skin. Fortunately, I’ve never found staying faithful to...
Read More
It’s officially Wedding Week. The ceremony is in four days, I’m overly busy, overly stressed and murderous impulses have begun pulsing through my body with every systolic beat of my filthy black heart. Maybe it’s the stress, but my tolerance levels for stupidity and inanity have dropped dramatically. I’m not quite to the literal (ie, not figurative) biting off of heads stage just yet, but I’m getting there....
Read More
We are forever slouching towards Wedding Day, with some days being more slouchy than others. The past few days have been both unproductive and uneventful, as we continue to suffer the effects of being Under The Weather. And, when you live deep in the armpit of Texas, there’s a lot of weather to be under. This past weekend brought us beautiful Autumnal weather, in the sense that highs in the mid-60s represents Fall for this part of the...
Read More
Kristian Bland
Writer
Occasional Geek
I'm a former Webmaster turned Journalist turned Systems Administrator. I once thought I could recreate Spider-Man's web fluid, but only ended up staining the driveway of my friend's parents when some of it spilled out and went runny. Eventually, I became a caustic tech geek, which I'm pretty sure inspired the character of Dr. Gregory House, although the bastards never credited me. Later in life, I'd go on to have a horrific experience in publishing that I don't talk about, except to talk about how I don't talk about it. Later still, I became a web editor and columnist for a Hearst newspaper, where I excelled at being Me until my entire department was unceremoniously laid off. After that, I spent about six months being pretty busy not being busy. It sucked. Then, after missing the light of my radiant glory casting its warmth upon the newsroom for long enough, the paper called me up and asked me back. So I went back. And then I left again. And here we are.
