- Do you like this site?
- Have you ever enjoyed reading anything here?
- Did you ever find anything helpful, informative, or even just funny?
Then now’s the time to pledge your support and not get a free tote bag or whatever PBS is shilling these days. I don’t even have any cool interns to man the phone banks I also don’t have, so don’t expect any of that business, either.
I was going to post this all in one go, but people seemed to really like the serialization I did throughout this past October with my Halloween horror story, so I thought it’d be fun to do it again.
When I started writing this, I had something very different in mind than where the story actually went, which is something new and scary for me since I like to know exactly what it is I’m writing as I write it. But this one took on a life of its own, and I just went where it led me. I’ll be posting new entries irregularly, so check back often.
I hope you enjoy it.
Once upon a time, a legendary candyman held a contest in which five lucky children won a tour of his mythical chocolate factory. That man was Mr. Wonka, and this is the story you were never told…
As I write this, it’s the last day of 2015 and I’m surrounded by Top Ten lists for everything from the best games of the year, to the best fast food burgers in the nation.
It’s annoying, so I thought I’d write my own, because my Top Ten Games of 2015 are way different than everyone else’s Top Ten Games of 2015. But then I thought, I don’t want to do that because Top Ten of the year lists are stupid and predictable and omnipresent.
So I decided to do it anyway, but not just for 2015.
BUT FOR ALL THE YEARS.
Last month, I was a mess. I was in a flat spin and spiraling my way into a deep, deep depression. I was even doing things like listening to country music, which is a good way to tell just how awful things are. It moves along a sliding scale, starting with Dolly Parton and ending somewhere around Kenny Rogers, which – if you’re listening to anything other than The Gambler – is when you know you’re nearing rock bottom.
Personally, I started by absentmindedly humming Hard Candy Christmas and worked my way down to listening to Kentucky Homemade Christmas in a parking lot while choking back tears and wondering where it all went wrong.
Christmas can be awful.
In my last post, I wrote about how amazing the GOG.com community is, and about how GOG’s Twitch Stream Team helped me get through a rotten Thanksgiving. They were great, as usual, but another – and infinitely more terrifying – holiday is coming up: Christmas.
And I don’t have any money.
Which is where Twitch comes in!
UPDATE: You did it! You saved Christmas! Click here for a small token of my thanks.